Dying Old

I thought about dying today.
How at the passing of my self, there would indeed be sorrow,
but it wouldn't last long.

For some, there might be a tinge of sadness for sometime,
it dulls as the time goes on, but never dissappears.
I could handle leaving this world, I thought.

Even so, what's the hurry of leaving this phase of life?

The next thing I thought about was being an old woman.
Alone, still.
Maybe with no one left.
Maybe with a few others left.

Where would I live?
So unattached?
In a small condo in New York City?
In an open field in the hills of Italy,
drinking table wine like water.

How will my days be filled,
looking out into the ocean off some beach,
or laughing about the Americans as an expat in another country.
or, most likely, in the hills of southern Iowa with my best friend,
and her son's family.

That would be the way to go.
Cradling a child.
Loving the Earth.
Feeling grateful.
And alive on my last breath.